"You never forget anything so please don't hand me the bull of you forgetting half your confession." He whispered back irritated, as he heard her sigh.
"I didn't say I forgot...just that..." her words trailed off as she heard him squirm in his seat. She as well, as they were not made for comfort, but to make your confession even more unbearable along with the Sacrament of Penance that was to be doled out. The hardness of the wood was getting to her back, so she sat up straighter trying to alleviate the pain running down her left leg.
"Reigne," she heard him say her name, running chills down her already hurting spine.
"Yes?" She could feel it well up inside her, the knowledge of what was to come.
"Do you remember?" His words were precise, to the point and she knew he wasn't alluding to the reason that brought her here.
She could hear his breath, steady, deep, and imagined his chest rising and falling with each one taken.
"I do." she said at last.
He leaned closer to the open window, his face glowing from the candle that was lit within his part of the confessional casting a shadowy dance upon the walls, the lattice pattern displayed as it were. She could see him, inhaling the fragrance of his cologne although priests were not supposed to wear it, were not punished for doing so. It was the same as before. As with his beliefs, he hardly ever veered from his ways. She wondered if he knew she would pick today to come in. Not unlike any other day for him, but for her there was one special reason for this day to speak of those things she had to endure for the sake of her career.
Working undercover for twenty years had hardened her to the things of this world. It didn't bother her as it used to, to do the things that was necessary to keep her character intact. Coming to confess on a regular basis when she first started out was her way of absolving herself of the crimes she committed against her own heart. Over the years there were at least four other priests that heard the deeds that were done, most of them yes, dirty at that.
He though, had been a different kind of listener. She thought to herself, that yes that was it, he listened to her instead of tuning her out and giving her the Our Fathers and Hail Marys and telling to to make sure to come back next week, Same Bat time, same Bat channel. He talked to her, delved deeper into her psyche. Cracks began to form in the hard exterior that she had worked so long to put into place. She began to think of him not only as a counselor, priest and listener, but her friend. Until...
"Did you ever ask forgiveness for it?" She heard a crack in his deep voice knowing he was thinking back to a time that should be dead and buried as the Saints in the catacombs.
"Yes..." the only word she could manage to form on her lips.
His face was now leaning against the lattice, eyes closed tight. Her hand automatically reached up to feel his skin against her fingers. He turned as she found his lips, tracing an outline on them, he in turn opening his mouth to kiss her finger.
She felt her chest tighten, as if all the air was sucked out of her lungs.
"Reigne, I never sought forgiveness. " his words echoed in her head over and over. "Love should never have to be something to forgive. And my heart will always love you."
She choked back the hot searing tears, licking her dry lips as she tried to find the words that would be appropriate. But what words could be?
“Father Cailean I don’t think we should...”
“What? Bring up the past? For chrissake Reigne I’ve not seen nor heard from you in six months! I thought you were transferred or worse, dead! I’ve been literally out of my mind, going through the motions trying to make it through each day and praying until way into the night for your safety and safe return. Please! Allow me this! Allow me to tell you how I feel for a change!”
